I was reading an article online titled, “15 Stupidest Celebrity Quotes” and suddenly thought of our local celebs. I figured, we have way lots of those here in the Philippines too. Sometimes, our very own talents would try to speak in English on interviews thinking that it's their chance to sound cooler--and way smarter to the Filipino audience. However, that's not the case for these celebs. Here are the funniest (and probably stupidest) quotes I’ve collected so far:
1. Hazel Cabrera (Viva Hot Babes)
“Hindi ako yun, because I have EARRINGS ON MY PUSOD!” –talking about an alleged scandalous nude photo/video that has swarmed the internet back in 2004. Apparently, some people grow ears on their belly-button too… one in particular is Hazel.
“I’m not pure Filipino, I’m half-American, half-Espanyol and half-Filipina”—explaining her roots to the press. Ergo, she is 1 ½ person—or should I say PERSONS??? Man, she really has to go back to studying fractions!
".... siyempre cause I'm part of the FHM Top 100 siksiyest woman in the world." –new list from FHM???
"..Fluttered ako!..." –like a BUTTERFLY?!
"...Hindi ako sanay kaso di pa naman ako nag-ka-relasyon sa Lisbian eh..." Lisbian or Lesbian?
“19 running to 20!” –when asked what her age was.
2. Rose Valencia
“plano naming gumawa ng fashion show parang *** sa VENCH understatement”—her answer on an interview with then “The Buzz” host Jobert Sucaldito, to which Jobert corrected her and said, Bench dapat.
“Sorry, wala akong pakialam sa kanya, hindi ko siya CLOSE FRIENDS!!!"—another one of her famous answers from a segment in “The Buzz” pertaining to one of her famous rivals in the adult film industry, Keanna Reeves. I kinda started to think (and count). Isn’t Keanna just ONE single person to be pluralized?!
“Meron akong HARD DRAMA”—I think she’s pretty much used to hard and soft (core) on adult films. She must have thought those terms could also be applied on drama.
"Palagi kong hawak iyon, laging nasa left hands yung dala ko..." –how many left hands do you have anyway???
3. Angelica Jones
"Ayoko kasi ng over-OA…" -over na OA pa!
“Hindi naman ako MILLIONARY!”
Hmmm… Note to self: Must have a serious talk with Sony International to change the game show to “Who Wants to be a Millionary”! Kinda like how it sounds. Pretty catchy. LOL.
“I’m not a GR. I’m DATS!” –her reply on a Senate hearing regarding her Jojo Veloso scandal. As some of you could recall, Jojo V. was accused of pimping his talents. As for her DATS reply, she was referring to That’s Entertainment.
"Ah oo, katatapos lang maganap yung tornament"
"wag na nating pag-usapan, CLOSE THE BOOK na yan."
4. Karen delos Santos
“Kailangan talaga naka-SPECIFICATE yung nasa listahan ha??” –her rant after reading a list of things to buy on an episode of “Extra Challenge”. SPECIFICATE??? Can someone hand her a dictionary?!
5. Tracy Torres
“Stop the War, Not Peace!” –NEED I SAY MORE?!
6. Melanie Marquez
“Don’t judge my brother coz he is not a book!”
“You're nothing but a second rate trying hard copycat like Cristy Fermin!"
“Hello? Bulag ka ba? Bingi ka ba? Are you dep?" JOHNNY DEPP???
“That's why I'm a success, it's because I don't middle in other people's lives”—e hindi naman daw kasi sya gumigitna sa buhay ng iba.
“I don't eat meat. I'm not a carnival.” –NO COMMENT.
“Nikki, you're so galing. You should go to the States. You will sell hotcakes!" –Her praise to Nikki Valdez after an awesome dance number at ASAP back then. Sell hotcakes? Nikki, I think it’d be best if you’d just stay here rather than sell hotcakes, dear.
"You can fool me once, you can even fool me twice, you can even fool me thrice. But you can never fool me four." –WINNER!!!
7. Michelle Madrigal
"We're friends... we're getting to know WITH each other...” —her answer to a reporter regarding a teen actor linked to her romantically.
8. Iya Villania
“Every night, I use ACETONE to clean my face.” After a few seconds she realized what she just said and blurted out, “Ay astringent pala!”
Wow! Acetone on your face… rejuvenating!
9. Jericho Rosales
“First of all, hindi ko sya binigyan ng kotse... Second of all, blah blah…” –about a car he allegedly bought for Cindy Kurleto, his then-girlfriend.
10. Rochelle Pangilinan (Sex Bomb Dancers)
"For the first place, hindi kami uminom ng likyur (liquor)."
Talk about BRAIN FART.
11. Madam Auring
“Pangarap naming magka-TUBE BABY!” –her hopes of having a family with her “Papa Archie”. Tube baby??? Like PVC tube baby?!
12. Myles Hernandez (Viva Hot Babes)
"The winner of this award will receive a special gift fack ..." –I don’t wanna talk about this.
"So nung nasa elevator kami, pinapa-push nya sa akin yung BOTTOM (button).”
"Hindi naman pornografy ang ginawa namin kaya wag naman sanang i-van (ban)"
13. Lara Morena
“Ok yan. Ten thumbs up ako d'yan!" –10 thumbs? Interesting. So how many fingers do you hava in all?
14. Mystica
"Actually Eto yung yung Beauty and Whitening Soap and Lotion na galing sa STAGE (States)..."
"Sana magkaroon pa ang MARKET TOUR ko ng Part One, Part Two, Part Three and Part More!"
15. Ivory Ilagan (Shampoo Beauties)
“Edge? Edad?” –confused when asked about her edge from other sexy stars.
16. Julia Lopez
“International KRAS (crush) ko noh di taga dito… si John JUSACK (Cusack)…” –OK nevermind.
17. Kris Aquino
“Shoeses ko?” –KIWI shoe polish commercial. I think it more than a gazillion shoes… Hence SHOESES.
18. Ara Mina
“You can never can tell…” CAN CAN CAN!!!
19. Angel Locsin
“Ang RULE (role) ko ditto…” –when asked about her role in an upcoming teleserye. Ruler huh?
20. Marian Rivera
“Isa po akong psychology at wala ako nakikitang diperensya Local and Foreign Issues.” –when asked about her stand on the upcoming elections, where she expressed her support to Noynoy Aquino. She was a Psychology student in La Salle Dasmarinas. Hence, the Psychology thingy on her statement.
21. Janina San Miguel (Bb. Pilipinas World 2008 winner)
Paolo Bediones: Janina, how are you?
Janina San Miguel: I’m fine.
Paolo Bediones: Alright, so you won two of the major awards - Best in Long Gown, Best in Swimsuit, do you feel any pressure right now?
Janina San Miguel: No, I don’t feel any pressure right now.
Paolo Bediones: Confident! Alright! Please choose a name of the judge.
Paolo Bediones: We have Miss Vivienne Tan.
Vivienne Tan: Good Evening.
Janina San Miguel: Good Evening.
Vivienne Tan: The question is, what role did your family play to you as candidate to Binibining Pilinas?
Janina San Miguel: Well, my family’s role for me is so important b’coz there was the wa- they’re, they was the one who’s… very… Hahahaha… Oh I’m so sorry, Ahhmm… My pamily… My family… Oh my god… I’m… Ok, I’m so sorry… I… I told you that I’m so confident… Eto, Ahhmm, Wait… Hahahaha, Ahmmm, Sorry guys because this was really my first pageant ever b’coz I’m only 17 years old and ahahaha I, I did not expect that I came from, I came from one of the tough 10. Hmmm, so… but I said dot my family is the most important persons in my life. Thank you.
…Way much better if you’d put the whole script in there. Make me reminisce even more. LOL
22. Venus Raj (4th Runner Up, Ms. Universe 2010)
William Baldwin: What is the biggest mistake that you’ve ever made in your life and what did you do to make it right?
Venus Raj: In my 22 years of existence, there is no major, major problem that I have done in my life because I am very confident with my family and the love they give to me.
I'll try to find more of these and post soon. Till then! :)
